Spotted Arrow


The Game

You know what game I am talking about. The game between men and women that resembles boys and girls on the playground. Just as children in our age already do too much of, it is a game that is played with our thumbs, texting as we seek to find the next word combination that will deliver the perfect wit. Usually accompanied with an lol or :), this game delves as much into our imagination as it does peek our interest and make us feel validated. I have played the game; I have won, lost, and drew.

The game has definitely changed over the years. It first originated as “the chase” in traditional communities. A man goes after a woman to seek her hand in marriage and to gain favor from her side of the family. This required patience, persistance, and an unrelenting drive to embarrass oneself while trying to charm a woman and her family. If all vested interests conceded to his impassionate stance to take her hand, the ceremony would follow and the long awaited consummation would finalize the coalescing of two families.

From traditional beginnings to modern times, “the chase” has become “the game,” and like the video games many children play today it is the exhilaration of fantasy without the understanding the consequences of reality. This game is a contact sport, just without the officials to call “foul.”

I would argue that “the game” is still a chase and that the rules are the same, just the people are not. Traditional communities are very cohesive and tight knit. Men and women are taken care of and secure. However, in these modern times men are without fathers and women are without mothers, and vice versa. The situation that children have grown up in can be very dysfunctional and at times this dysfunctionality can permeate the way in which “the game” is played. From my vantage point, the insecurity of men and the traumatization of women severely undermines any success anyone has at playing the so-called “game.”

The end result of “the game” is any number of outcomes. Whereas in the past the one outcome was marriage, the outcome of today’s “game” usually leads to someone getting hurt. In the end, “the game” is not really a game at all, because although games are just for fun, this is a game you don’t want to play with.

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